The Burning Question

Why do I need to read about question marks? Isn't its use very straightforward? Who the heck is using it incorrectly?

Perhaps you are asking yourself these questions. However, consider the following sentences:

• On your worksheet, write down who is the main character in The Odyssey?
• I asked if she enjoyed the book?

Is this wrong? If you're unsure, read on. It has come to the attention of many grammarians that everything these days seems to be a question. Anytime our voice goes up at the end of a sentence, we think we need a question mark? Especially teenagers? Well stop it, already! Let's write with a little confidence, people.

Question marks should only be used when a question is being directly asked. Contrary to the popular belief of so many teachers, commands on a quiz that request students to write an answer do not require a question mark! The sentences above should read:

• On your worksheet, write down the name of the main character in the Odyssey.
• I asked if she enjoyed the book.

Or, if you just can't stand not using the lovely punctuation with its "elegant seahorse profile," as Truss lovingly writes, rephrase it as follows:

• Who is the main character in the Odyssey?
• I asked her, "Did you enjoy the book?".

How on earth are you to figure this out on your own? A good rule of thumb is to read the sentence with a dramatic "up" in tone at the end of the sentence anywhere you write a question mark. If it sounds funny, fix it, for heaven's sake.